There are little words needed to describe the insanity of Date Movie but if you're the type who enjoys it when Eddie Griffin gets a mouthful of hair and sweat and then promptly throws it up, you'll love this movie. I don't. ***

From 2 of the 6 writers of Scary Movie 3, Date Movie is about as intelligent, ripping on romantic comedies until it is blue in the face. The only problem is that the parodies are far to wide, far too all encompassing and all over the map. Apparently, the film enlisted the help of the two writers that brought Scary Movie 3 down. ***

The beauty of a parody like Airplane (the first "parody" type movie) is that it skillfully mixed in your face rip off jokes with subtle humour. The funniest joke in the movie isn't a parody but merely a line that is repeated throughout the film and the skill is in the deadpan delivery to most of it. ***

Date Movie is so in your face it ceases to be funny. Sure there are some great moments, like the rip off of the therapy scene in Mr. & Mrs. Smith but for every great scene there are 10 other horrible ones. Comedy is about hitting more times than you miss and Date Movie misses around almost every corner. ***

Date Movie is aimed at the same crowd that ate up the Scary Movie series. Those people grow up, though. I know I enjoyed the first Scary Movie but I was young still. That crowd has grown up and a new crowd of ten year olds are ready to embrace the completely juvenile humor. ***

If you enjoy these in your face type parodies, more power to you. Everyone's favorite lesbian witch from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Alyson Hannigan is the Bridget Jones type character that Date Movie centers around. Julia Jones is her name in this one (har har) and she's fat and ugly until Hitch (Tony Cox) pimps her out and she turns beautiful. She falls in love with Grant Fonchyerdoder (sound it out) and there are series of Meet the Parents, Meet the Fockers, and My Best Friend's Wedding like wacky hi-jinx to go along with it, until the eventual almost marriage and them romantically getting back together. ***

Alyson Hannigan, who can been seen on the hit show How I Married Your Mother is a great actress and a funny one too but she's merely the sideshow vessel here. She's a conduit to the action and doesn't really get to do much of interest. Lil Jon was funnier than her and he only had three words (I'll let you guess them). ***

Really, Date Movie is a review proof movie. If you like dumb parody, you're going to be in heaven. If you think it looks like a great movie, you're probably going to love every second of it. If you're sick of dumb parody, if you don't like movies that constantly resort to the grossest situation possible (like the cat humping Julia's dead grandmother) then this just isn't your cup of tea.

Personally, I don't drink tea very often. ***

Image and Sound:

Fox transfers are usually solid but Date Movie seems to be quite average. Most of the disc looks and sounds good but there are a few scenes that seem dull. ***

For such a bad movie, Fox has gone and stuffed this DVD so full of special features, it might be worth renting just to check out a few of the more engaging features. ***

The best feature is the "anti-commentary" track in which movie critics Scott Foundas and Bob Strauss have carte blanche and just go after the movie. They explain why the film just isn't funny. It's awesome that FOX let this happen as they must know what garbage the film was and it really presents a fun image for the company. I'd watch this over watching the movie. ***

There are also two other commentaries but none of them as exciting or as groundbreaking as the "anti-commentary". One has director/co-writer Aaron Seltzer and co-writer Jason Friedberg making bad jokes about how bad their movie is. There's also a lot of bleeping out in the trailer which is annoying for an unrated version. The other commentary has most of the cast just sort of being there, making fun of Fox legal and the sort. Not very interesting but there can't be a lot to say about a movie like this one. ***

12 deleted and extended scenes await the poor chaps who think this stuff is actually funny. A lot of it is extended scenes of scenes that weren't all that funny to being with. Funnier is the bad date press junket, which takes press material from Eddie Griffen and others to create a clip show of bad dates, spliced together. It works because it has nothing to do with the movie, sadly. ***

If you really want to, you can watch the film with a laugh track. With, weirdly, is sort of enjoyable your first time through or if you're watching the film by yourself. Don't get me wrong, I don't love the feature but it works in a kitchy way. ***

With "The Quickie", you can watch the film boiled down to its core elements. It runs 6 minutes long and I'd recommend watching it instead of the movie. ***

There's also the Fox Channel special "Making A Spoof" on the disc but it's only engaging for about two minutes before it gets old. The rest of the features, like a multitude of trailers and "romantic backgrounds" are filler and not worth mentioning or looking at. ***

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