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Y Tu Mamá También - Special Edition

Now I'm sure everyone old enough to attend an unrated movie is familiar with the common conception that the male species does its thinking with its genitalia rather than its cerebrum. Strangely enough, I'm reminded of a line from "South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut," which reads "Hey! You need to stop thinking with your dick!" This thought crossed my mind more than once while watching "Y Tu Mamá También," a sex addict's slice of heaven that takes a brazen yet unaffecting approach to matters of sexuality, friendship, and love, skewering the dividing lines between these elements yet never putting them into perspective. ***

For those of you wondering just what all the fuss is about the film, I'll tell you. In concern to its frankness in depicting gratuitous sex acts that range from heterosexual to homosexual, and the vast arena in between, this is about as in-your-face as you can find without having to slip quietly into the back room of a novelty store to purchase cheesy pornos and mulled-over magazines. The film's opening shot is a rather shocking sight: two young teenagers engaging in a little beef/taco interaction, all the while making promises never to be unfaithful to one another. ***

The two youngsters are Tenoch (Diego Luna) and his girlfriend, the latter of whom is going on a summer trip to Italy with the girlfriend of Tenoch's best friend, Julio (Gael García Bernal), who can also been seen within the film's initial moments driving it home. The initial absence of their- oh, for lack of a better word, we'll refer to them as receptors- leaves the two boys lonely and needy, until they cross paths with Luisa (Maribel Verdú), the lonely wife of Tenoch's cousin. They become instantly attracted to her, so much so that speaking her very name affords them a poolside climax, after which we get a rather tasteless shot of man-juice hitting the water (yummy). ***

It should come as no surprise, however, that the film's sexual basis is one of it's strong points as well its damning censure. Director Alfonso Cuarón's take-no-prisoners approach to the material is admirable in that he shows no shame in his depictions of sex, and hot sex at that. But you've seen one lurid exploration of learning how to improve one's satin sheet talents, and you've pretty much seen everything the film has to offer. The focus on flesh and nubile bodies pawing at one another, while strains of Spanish music play in the background and sunlight hits all the right spots, becomes quite uninvolving by the one-thousandth encounter, give or take a couple hundred. To be honest, this makes movies like "American Pie" and "National Lampoon's Van Wilder" look like something out of a Victoria's Secret catalog. ***

What makes the movie so disappointing is the fact that the story backing the sexuality is nothing more than a meandering road trip masquerading as a coming-of-age, self-awakening piece full of power and deep thought. This may be what co-writers Alfonso and Carlos Cuarón had in mind, but never in movie history has the result been farther from that which was intended. ***

For one thing, the characters themselves are not that interesting once they embark on their trek to a beach they call Heaven's Mouth, supposedly ficticious, yet making its way into the story in the final, morose act. The boys offer Luisa a chance to go with them; conveniently, soon after, she receives a call from her husband, who has been cheating and is plagued by a guilty conscience. Ready for some life-affirming action, she leaves with the two boys, and to give you a brief lowdown, she screws one, then the other, causing them both to reveal long-hidden secrets they've been keeping from one another in an attempt to win over her affections. ***

This segment of the film couldn't possibly be less interesting. It all boils down to standard he-said-she-said bickering and shouting, crossed with quiet moments where we are supposed to look deeper into these turgid relationships for things like connection, loyalty, trust, and devotion. When the time came for these examinations, I was so put off with talk of Julio sleeping with Tenoch's girlfriend, and vice versa, not to mention the constant whining of Luisa, who spends the film wallowing in self-pity as the filmmakers attempt to squeeze every ounce of sympathy out of the audience. Another comparison comes to mind here: in an episode of television's "Will and Grace," Megan Mullally's character tells her boss, "The only thing you have in common [with Julia Roberts] is horse teeth and bad taste in men." I think that pretty much sums up Luisa and her two bumbling, boyish, love-sick burrito boys. *** Walk into this enchilada with lo-o-o-o-w expectations, and a fetish for life-changing dramas buried underneath a barrage of Wham, Bham, Thank You Ma'am sentiment, and you just might find something to admire in "Y Tu Mamá También," which has to be one of the biggest pieces of foreign hooey to be deemed a classic in all of film history. --

The image transfer of the 1.85:1 aspect ratio for the film features a splendid canvas of solid, rich colors and deep pure blacks, which are also accompanied by excellent shadow delineation that fits the movie's grainy, textured appearance, accurate fleshtones, and edges that are sharp when they need to be, and fuzzy when called for. There are minor elements of unwanted noise that pop up here and there, but anyone immersed in the movie itself won't much notice. ***

The sound makes ample use of the 5.1 soundfield available to it, retaining an ambiance and spatial quality that keeps the atmosphere enveloping. Dialogue has been reproduced exquisitely, and is not overpowered by things like music or sound effects, which can be heard coming from all directions throughout the film. Deep bass is reserved almost all the time, but it is of little importance to the piece, so it hardly seems to matter.

As if "Y Tu Mamá También" weren't enough, we're also subjected to a short film from co-writer Carlos Cuarón, entitled "Me La Debes," or "You Owe Me One." In it, we meet a family of three: father/husband, mother/wife, and young, hormonal daughter, whom the mother thinks is carrying on with her boyfriend in the next room and insists that her husband investigate, when in reality, Mama is the one having the affair all along, but don't worry, because Papa is getting it own with the maid downstairs while Daughter has a little fun of her own as Mama tries to calm the dog outside. I don't really understand the reasons for the inclusion of this piece, unless the filmmakers thought we didn't get enough gratuitous sex in the feature film. ***

The behind-the-scenes featurette is as jumbled and lazy as the movie itself, featuring uninteresting footage from the movie juxtaposed with footage taken during production. The facts, or what little are presented, aren't even noteworthy, and it would have been nice to get the opinions of the actors on such things as doing the sex scenes, how they prepared, and how they felt afterwards (Oh, wait! That's probably on the commentary, too!). The deleted scenes and trailer are just last-minute add-ons, and the overall experience, even moreso than the movie, tends to be very aggravating and wasteful of one's time.